Y Ways

Tommyism-on and off ramps on the highway are called "Y ways"!
Why?? Cause their shaped like a "Y" silly.
 Now everytime I get off and on the highway Tommy says-we are on the "Y" way again!!

What does Marry Mean?

Listening to a song on the radio Tommy says, "Hey mom what does Marry mean?" I say, "It means when two people really love each other and they want to be together forever they get married." He doesn't say anything but he smiles. I say, "What are you thinking?" He says, "What does forever mean?"  I say, "It means a very long time until your old." He says, "Like Aunty Vette and John." I say, "Yes They are old!"  He says, "Are they married??" I say, "No! Me and your daddy are married we are not old." He looks shocked, and says, "So you and daddy are going to be like aunty Vette and John?" Sigh.. This conversation is going nowhere!! :) LMAO

That's alot of Talking

Today I asked Tommy was his day. He shrugs his shoulders and says, "Good." I asked if he had a job today he says,"No! Dey keep forgetting  I am there." I say, "Are you being a good listener?" He says,
" I aways wisten." I ask, "Did you tell your friends you had a playdate yesterday." He says, "Yeah but not everybody thats too much to talk." I ask, " Did you do a project today?" He sighs and says, "Mom whay do you keep asking me dis stuff  thats a lot of talking!"  I laugh and say, " I missed you I just want to know what you do when I am not with you." He smiles, then says, "Oh awight you can ask me too much stuff I guess!"

Staying Awake

On the way to school one morning, Tommy yawns and says, "Mom I am trying to keep my mouth shut so I can wake up for school but it keeps opening all by itself!"

Best Job Ever

Tommy says, "Mom today was the best day eber!I say,"Yeah? What happened?"  Tommy says," I was da wine weader!!! Dats my faborite job in the whole world!" I say, " Why do you like it so much?" Tommy says, "Cause all day wong I get to be first and its wike I am da boss!"

Mysterious Santa

I am at Target with son. I gave him the no toys pep talk. So we are "looking" at toys he wants from Santa! We get to the last isle and he says",OK lets do it again dis time I gonna pway wid dem." I say, "No we have to go!" He starts to tantrum.Then we hear"Ho! Ho! Remember Be GOOD!" We both freeze and look around and don't see anyone! But he was an angel the rest of the time at the store. Thanks "Santa"whoever you were!

Explaining heaven

Picking up my son from school. A little girl was waving at me. I ask,"Tommy who is that girl?"  He says, "Mom she cwys everyday in the early room. It is so annoying!"  I say," Aww she must miss her mommy. Maybe she doesn't understand she will be back." He says, "Yeah i remember crying , cause I thought you were going to heaven." I say, "You thought I wasn't coming back?"He says," Naww I was sad cause i had no friends."

Shopping

At the mall looking for a baby shower present and Tom spots a suitcase. He says, "Mom I need this!" I say,"You can ask Santa."  He starts to cry! Then he has a tantrum and then looks at me. He says, "Now?"  I say,"No now put it back!" He stomps away and comes back crying. We are in line to pay and he still crying. He looks up and says,"Now?" I say, "No!" He says, "NO! Your supposed to say oh alright!" I say, "I am not your father."

Can You Marry your Mom?

I called my son by his whole name. He says," Mom when you say that you have to tell me something!" I say, "I love you!" He screams and runs away saying, " Ahh..I am married!" I say, "What??" He says, Wait I only kidding I can't marry you can I???"

Magic Syrup

One day I was giving Tommy some cough medicine and he says"Mom I wuv dis stuff I wish I could drink it in a cup it dewisous! I say, "I am glad it helps you!" He says,"What does it help me wit?"  I say, "It helps you stop coughing." He says, Does it help me from doing bad stuff?" I laugh, "NO!" He says,"Where's dat medicine??" 

 I wish I knew... Someone work on that one! ;0)

The Difference Between Boys and Girls

I am in the bathroom and of course my four year old son comes walking in.  He smiles and then looks puzzled. I say, "Whats the matter?"  He says, " Mom why do you pee out your butt? I pee like this (he demonstrates standing up pushes his pelvis foward)." I say, " I have an inny and you have and outy" . Mine is called a Vagina and yours is called a Penis. He went into the kitchen and told his sister and father the news. He said I have ENIS and and mom has a Vageena!  Sigh....

You will always be my baby

Tommy says, “Mom I am still your baby wight?” I say. “Always!” He says, “Member when I was in your bewwy?” I say, “Yeah, do you?” He smiles and says, “Yeah i kept kicking you twying to get out!” I say, ” How did you get out?” He lifts up my shirt and looks puzzled. I say, “What are you looking for?” He says, “the door!” Haaaa…wait till he finds that one out! :)”

Tommy T-shirt

I am getting Tommy ready for bed! I take off his clothes and put on his pajamas. I say,”Tommy can you please put your T-shirt in the hamper.” He picks up the shirt looks at it very closely. I say, “What are you looking for?” He says, “The “T”!”   :)

Tommy Quotes

Four year old: “Mom why do you wite(light) candles?”
Mom: “Because it makes the house smell so good. “
Four year old: “But why? Houses can’t smell!” :)”

Tommy's Stick

One afternoon I was meeting my Mom for lunch at a local resteraunt. Along for the ride was my 3 year old son , My 10 year old daughter, and my 7 year old niece. My son discovered my daughters glittery batton and adopted it as his “magic stick”. He brought it everywhere and today was no exception. We arrived at the resteraunt and we see my mom and park the car. My three year old, Tommy asks, ” Mom can I bwing in my “dick” ?” I sigh, “Yes you can bring in your “stick” but you have to promise to behave!” He nods and we walk into the resteraunt and are seated in a large booth. Tommy broke his promise and was being aggressive with the stick and nearly knocks over a glass of soda. I take the stick and explain, ” Tommy we are going to have to put your stick for a nap untill after we are finished with our lunch.” Tommy frowns, crosses his arms across his chest and agrees. Then as luck would have it, the stick rolls off the booth and onto the floor stuck in between the booth and the wall. Tommy shreiks in alarm, and yells, “My dick, My dick, what happened to my dick?” I try to reach it but it is too narrow. Tommy crawls under the table and tries to reach it. The waitress come by and asks, ” Is everyting ok?” Tommy pleads, “My dick! My dick! it’s stuck in there!” The waitress looks appauled. I explain, “He dropped his “stick” and we can’t reach it.” The waitress relaxes and smiles, “I got an idea.” She leaves and comes back with a broom and rescues the “stick”. My son grabs it and hugs it close to his body and says. ” My dick, my dick I so glad I found you I dot you were wost foreber!” Needless to say the “magic stick” never made a public appearance again!! My favortie “Tommy” story!!